Tim Ewald or Walter White?

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Coincidence? We think not.

Nicole Perera, Writer

Let me tell you a little anecdote of how Walter White, from the TV show Breaking Bad, is, as a matter of fact, Black River’s infamous Mr. Tim Ewald.

It would be quite pretentious to neglect the ‘coincidental’ resemblance between the men: they are simultaneously both high school chemistry teachers with similar mild-mannered temperaments and, from the picture above, you can see they are clearly physically identical. Did you even TRY to hide your identity, Ewald?

Breaking Bad stopped airing episodes in 2013, when Walter earned his $80 million dollars due to illegal behavior, lucky circumstances, and cooking meth, which (spoiler alert) influenced his death. Yet (super spoiler alert) many fans of the show squabble if he truly died then and there.

An undercover investigation here at Black River in the last 2 hours discovered that in 2013, Mr. Ewald was employed as a chemistry teacher after moving from Albuquerque, New Mexico to Holland, Michigan. In addition, before White’s confinement at a prison in New Mexico, he was a chemistry teacher. Therefore it would be logical to return to his previous life after his prison duration, with a different identity: Mr. Tim Ewald.

We students cannot be fooled any longer about Mr. Ewald’s true identity. We see you.